From a teen’s perspective: dealing with college admission stress

From a teen’s perspective: dealing with college admission stress

I came across an article by a student at Menlo Atherton (Dylan Lanier) that I wanted to share. You can access it here or read it below. 

I’m 20+ years out from college (and a low-stress application process), but my days are wrapped up in this world. When I think about college admissions today compared to even a few years ago, the #1 thing that stands out is how much more stressful it is for everyone involved. The number of students (and almost always, they are excellent top students) we see presenting mental health red flags is far too high.  

Where you go to college is…simply where you go to college. It’s four years of exploration, developing independence, and figuring it out. I hope both students and parents who are in or approaching this process can keep in mind that it’s a four-year stop on a long journey; it’s not the end game, and it’s not an ultimate goal. 

It’s that time of year again: No, not Pisces season. College acceptance — and rejection — season.

At M-A, the energy is electric, and not always in the best way. Seniors are on pins-and-needles waiting for letters to come back from the colleges they applied to a few months back. Juniors, on the other hand, are already stressing about their own applications to come next year.

While I recognize the importance of higher education, I think that too many of us compromise our mental health by spending countless hours worrying about college. It’s important to enforce practices in your daily life that help you decompress. Not only will you be a happier and healthier person, but you will perform better in all areas of your life. You can’t crush that AP Lit test if you’re only thinking about college! So, here are some of the ways I find most effective to de-stress:

1. Time Away: Find a relaxing activity you truly enjoy, be it hiking, painting, or reading on the couch. Set a designated time for yourself each day or week to spend solely on that recreation. I recommend choosing a hobby that requires a lot of focus in order to prevent your mind from wandering back to college.

2. Community: Your family and friends are great resources for support and distraction. Go out to dinner, watch a movie, or just talk about everything under the sun other than college. Connecting with others will not only lift your spirits but place your attention on them instead of your own worries.

3. New Goals: The reason college admissions are so stressful is that we view them as the ultimate goal. Therefore, pick new, smaller goals that can help you satiate that need for accomplishment, such as learning an instrument or holding a bake sale for a local charity.

4. Mindfulness: Look, when I first tried meditation, I was just as skeptical about its benefits. But I can confidently say that it has considerably lowered my stress level and allowed me to reflect on my life without the typical emotional responses. I recommend downloading an app like Calm or finding guided mindfulness meditations on YouTube to help you commit to and get the most out of the practice.

Acknowledging your college stress and recognizing the negativity it brings into your life is the most important step. Understand how it’s impacting your daily life and respond accordingly with specific, customized strategies to limit those effects.

However you choose to de-stress, be sure to fully commit to the process. Take it from a fellow student: Nothing is more important than your well-being, and taking concrete steps to improve it will yield exponential benefits. Best of luck in your collegiate endeavors and your journey to de-stress!

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Dear Struggling Parents, It’s Not Just You.

Dear Struggling Parents, It’s Not Just You.

TIME’s It’s Not Just You newsletter is a good one. This past week it was a letter to parents of teens, many of whom are struggling right now, plus a selection of expert pandemic parenting advice.

Parenting teenagers in the middle of a once-in-100-years pandemic is hard, doing so while they are applying to college in a year when the whole college process has blown up, and it’s even harder.

Check out the newsletter or signup here.

 

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3rd Annual New York Times Podcast Contest

3rd Annual New York Times Podcast Contest

Awesome opportunity via the NYT/The Learning Network:

“We are running our Third Annual Podcast Contest right now for middle and high school students until May 19. To enter, students should submit a five-minute podcast on any subject they want, including sports, music, politics and literature. They can work individually or as a team, and they can create their podcasts from home.

If you’re not sure how to get started with podcasting, we just published two new resources that can help: our Podcasting Unit and our Podcasting Mentor Text. Each provides a step-by-step guide for creating an original podcast, and we offer 23 winning student podcasts as models.

Sign up for our free webinar on April 29 to help you learn more about our podcast contest and podcasting in general. After all, podcasting is a great way for students to strengthen their writing, research and digital media skills.”

 

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Why High School Students Should Practice Mindfulness


A site I follow, Hey Sigmund, recently posted a piece on mindfulness and why it is so popular, and it made me think about the importance of cultivating this practice in high school. You can read it here, and I suggest you do! Reading it also reminded me of an organization I admire, Mindful Schools. I took their Mindfulness Fundamentals class and really enjoyed it; they have great resources for educators and parents, too.

Anyway…I wrote the post below last year, but thought I would re-post as this topic is always in-season!

Since I’ve been practicing mindfulness for many years, I’ve enjoyed reading more about it everywhere from psychology journals to the wellness and lifestyle blogs I (embarrassingly) follow. If I can do it, I am certain anyone can, and it seems that everyone is.

What’s mindfulness? There are lots of variations of the definition, but I’ll use this one from UC Berkeley’s Great Good, The Science of a Meaningful Life website:

Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment.

Mindfulness also involves acceptance, meaning that we pay attention to our thoughts and feelings without judging them—without believing, for instance, that there’s a “right” or “wrong” way to think or feel in a given moment. When we practice mindfulness, our thoughts tune into what we’re sensing in the present moment rather than rehashing the past or imagining the future.

What I think is so extraordinary about mindfulness is that it can literally change your brain. Research has found that it increases the density of gray matter in the brain that is linked to learning, memory, emotion regulation, and empathy. Give this a listen:

Decreased stressed.

Less likely to respond to one’s own negative thinking.

Reduces risk of depression and anxiety.

Mindfulness is important because students today often feel all of these emotions and more—but especially stress, negative thinking, anxiety and sometimes even depression—during the college search and application process. It’s the ability to regulate these emotions, just to name one important benefit, that mindfulness supports. Mindfulness helps students not feel overwhelmed by difficult emotions and allows them to create space between emotions and responses so they can think first and then react. Over time, students become better listeners, feel more present, and less distracted.

Students can’t change everything that happens to them—from losing the big game to not doing well on an important test, and especially where they end up getting admitted or not getting admitted to college—but they can change the way they experience life’s ups and downs.

Contact us to talk about how mindfulness can help!